12/07/2006
New self esteem article database
Just letting you all know that I have been working on building a new article and posting system on my website at: http://articles.instant-self-esteem.com/.
Rather than make frequent "blog-style" posts, I will be releasing full length articles on a regular basis -- you are welcome to subscribe using your RSS reader (and if you don't know what that is or where you can find a free one, you can either read about it here http://www.feedster.com/help/rssopml.php, or try using Firefox (download it at http://www.mozilla.com/firefox/), which has it's own built-in RSS reader, instead of Microsoft Internet Explorer, or you can wait for the new version of Microsoft Internet Explorer (IE7) hopefully later this year which will also have it's own RSS reader.
All the best!
Robert
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06/04/2006
How To Build Self Esteem By Faking It
A while ago (OK, too long, I know, blogs are supposed to be more regular than mine, but I don't want to clutter it with trivia ...) I wrote an article about "How To Get Instant Self Esteem And Self Confidence In The Next 15 Mins" (It's worth reading alongside this blog).
I had been thinking about how important this philosophy is, particularly with some new work I have been undertaking where my own emotional state has been somewhat up and down in the space of a few hours. It being on my mind, I have just sent an article out to my subscribers reminding them of the application of this powerful technique and I thought I would post some thoughts about it on the blog too ...
To summarize, the technique takes on the philosophy that we are essentially "at effect" of our emotional states at any point in the day.
And that these emotional states in turn direct our thoughts and actions (obviously - you feel happy ... so you think happy thoughts and then do fun things).
So if you can influence ... or even deliberately create ... your own emotional states, then it in turn will have a domino effect of creating matching thoughts and actions.
The problem is, when you first start doing it, it feels a little 'fake'.
However ... ALL our emotional states are 'faked' (and I mean this respectfully - they feel 'real' at the time). If they weren't, then how come we can turn them on and off at will - for example by reading a book or watching a movie. When we read a book or watch a movie and come to a sad part or a happy part, don't we in turn feel affected? But it's just fake, right?
Anyway, enough of my preaching to you ... my point is, I have been re-reminded to create my own states ... even when I don't feel like it and I want to wallow around in self pity.
That's the very time to practice 'Being As If'. (Or 'Fake It Til You Make It')
All the best!
Robert
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27/11/2005
How You Can Avoid Sabotaging Your Own Self Esteem
I've been really busy lately, adding a huge self help article library to my website and writing new ones myself ... hence the rather noticeable lack of posting recently.
However, I've just posted a full article at my own website about the subject of 'New Age Guilt' and how it might sabotage your self esteem (click the link to read it) and it has got me thinking quite curiously.
My thinking about this subject was actually re-stimulated when I was reading another author's article about self confidence and building self esteem ... who was pretty much making the same point.
What point?
Well, that our predilection for taking the advice of self help 'gurus' has resulted in an overly biased, 'inward looking' approach.
Meaning: You are a mess; you created your own mess; you are responsible for creating this mess; AND you are responsible for getting yourself out of this mess!
Ouch ...
You mean, not only do I feel lousy about myself, but I should feel lousy about the lousy job I'm doing with my life?
Yep. (Apparently!)
Hmmmm. Nothing worse than feeling guilty about feeling guilty. It's a downward spiral.
But how do we overcome this? It is such a wonderful skill to self analyze and discover ways in which we can improve. To have those 'Aha' light-bulb moments.
I think it is best to stick to some good old fashioned common sense.
I like to use the phrase;
"No matter what you say or do to me, I am still a worthwhile person"
It tends to stop the New Age Guilt seeping in, even when the person talking to you is your own nagging new age self.
Sure, we should all keep looking for ways to get personal development and self improvement.
But don't let any apparent 'lack' in you be the cause of you beating yourself up.
It only makes things worse.
Oh by the way ... just in case you are now thinking ... "Oh God he's right, what an idiot I have been, beating myself up about my low self esteem, how could I do that, I must stop it, oh I'm such a loser ..."
STOP IT!!!!!
Look for all the positives and remember, there is always someone worse off than us .... and equally always someone better off. And self inflicted pain as a result of you comparing yourself to others is optional!
All the best in your journey!
Robert
Find out more ways to inflict better self esteem and self confidence on you and your friends ... FREE ... at http://www.selfesteemplus.com/
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